The Stag

Location: Eddies, one last time... (maybe?)

Time: 11:45 pm

My friend was once again bar tending at the local dive down the street from my work. Mel and I were suppose to go together at the end of our long closing shift, but she had to be up early.

She said she would grab a beer with me, but I could tell by her seven am wake up call that this would be a greater favor than she really wanted to give. I lovingly let her off the hook when I found out two of my other friends would both be up there as well.

I reached the bar after work by myself, and I have never even walked into this establishment alone. I leaned up to the bar and said, "Where are they?"

Jamie, the bartender told me they had left five minutes ago. "But I texted you five minutes ago?"

Apparently, he really thought they were going to stay, even though they got their food to go. I looked around at the other two people sitting at his bar and realized, he may have just been desperate.

"James, I don't know if I'm that guy. I don't know if I can sit here. I'll give you one beer and then I'm out." He told me it was going to be okay, and poured me a beer that tasted like a shot of Nyquil.

I complained and he grabbed me a beer from the back bar. I sat playing with my iPhone, going on facebook, texting people and attempting to guilt them out for not being there, and then feeling guilty for guilting them.

Once Jamie and I went over our usual repertoire I looked at my phone and noticed only fifteen minutes had passed.

I was grasping for straws, "So, what's your favorite television show right now?"

The problem was, I couldn't leave him, and part of me wanted to prove I could sit there for an hour without codependency rearing it's ugly head.

He poured me a second beer. I asked him to hand me the box to play the virtual poker game that was being shown on most of the televisions. A man sat down next to me, and also had a box.

"I don't even know why you're playing because I am a crazy poker player," I darted to the man taking up my once ten bar stools of space. He grimaced without saying a word.

I am a very competitive person by nature. I guess that's not the right word. I am a shit talker by nature. I am willing to say I am the best at everything, and then when I fail I become belligerent, even without the consumption of alcohol.

"Oh you mucked your cards? What did you have a two and a four?"
"You weren't expecting me to come at you with a three of a kind of queens, were you?"
"Don't worry, I'm sure you'll get all your money back eventually, NOT."

I guess he didn't find my annoying banter amusing, and pressed, "All In," on my key pad when I was not looking. I had a nine and a seven. I was toast.

"What the hell? Why would you do that?"

"Guess you should've stopped talking."

Just then I looked around for someone to have my back. And I realized I was there alone, and I had forgotten. I was actually having fun without the need for a friend, a boyfriend, or even a family member. Even though I was now playing with my fake five hundred dollars as opposed to my once seven thousand.

He laughed, and I laughed even though on the inside I thought he was an asshole.

I realized in that moment that may be what I was looking for wasn't a man. Maybe all this time I just needed the esteem in myself to go at life alone. When we started a new hand of Texas Hold 'Em I looked at my cards in the digital device and I had two kings.

I didn't need a king anymore, but I decided I would beat this sucker's ass one last time.

The Almost Every Man

I called my blog, "Norm!" because of the way the television show "Cheers" always announces him when he arrives at his favorite bar. It wasn't that I wanted to become a lush like him, but the idea of having an extended family that you only see in one place intrigued me.

I find it very interesting that people can make relationships based on having a drink with someone once a week or in Norm's case every night at a local bar.

I wanted to add what people lovingly refer to as Normism's onto my blog. It is a YouTube video that people have made with his favorite quotes. I hope you enjoy.




Also, this happens to be one of my favorite openers from "Cheers," because it brings the entire bar together, and reminds me that camaraderie is really the main reason for grabbing a beer.